Now, onto today’s topic: how to know if you're sexually compatible with someone.
Q: I’ve been in two long-term relationships that fell apart because we stopped having sex.
Now that you’ve had these two relationships, you may feel more clear on what you’re looking for in a partner and what good chemistry feels like between you and another person.
I ended the relationship each time, and even though they were hard decisions, I was proud of myself for realizing I needed more. Now that I’m starting to date again, I’m wondering if I should be changing my dating strategy to find more suitable partners.In your case, you want to look for someone who is as open as you in stating that sex is a crucial part of a relationship. Some people only have sex because they think it’s what they’re “supposed” to do.Once you start dating someone new, have a conversation or two about what sex means to you and what you get out of it. Others avoid sex due to past traumatic sexual experiences.You need to be able to talk about awkward or uncomfortable moments, and about the good times too! You also want your partner to be active about addressing problems.If the two of you aren’t able to talk about sex openly and honestly, it’s not a good sign of things to come. Perhaps the single most important characteristic to look for in a sexual partner is their willingness to put effort into keeping your sex life interesting, romantic, and intimate. Even the most sexually compatible couples are going to argue about sex from time to time.Here are six things to look for when determining how compatible you might be.This one should sound totally obvious, but you’d be surprised by how many people stay in relationships where there’s no chemistry whatsoever, even from the very beginning.We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship.But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions?It can take a little while to develop the trust necessary for good communication, but you want to look for partners who don’t seem to shy away from talking. And every couple is going to have to deal with life challenges and stresses that negatively impact their sex life.Keeping your sex life hot over the course of years (or even your entire lifetime! You want a partner who will make an active effort to keep making room for your sex life, even when it feels like it’s the two of you against the world.