The few men I spoke who do still occasionally approach women without using a dating app first all described that flush of excitement you get, regardless of the outcome."Nothing more rewarding than getting a girl's number in a bar," one told me, "You feel good about yourself.I just hope it doesn't become the way my generation remember meeting people.Social behaviour tends to have a multiplier effect: the less we approach each other, the weirder it is going to feel.Everyone had a story to relate about Facebook friends turning kidnappers, handsome teens in chatrooms turning out to be adult men, children revealing personal details while playing online games and so on.The women had different ideas about why children have no qualms about talking to strangers online and why parents remain in the dark about this behaviour.But we shouldn't forget the romance of randomly meeting someone who hasn't been vetted through swipes and pre-approved photographs, the excitement of looking at someone and not yet knowing if they are single or whether they like but feeling compelled enough to find out.
Where once we looked outwards for people we liked, hoping one is delivered on the wings of chance, now we bow our heads and flick through carefully managed bios and outdated group shots.Granted it has some downfalls on account of some creeps out there, but that can be quickly overlooked. At a recent ladies’ get-together, discussion about the murky world of online grooming, cyber stalking, and identity thieves found its way to our lunch table.My best friend James confirmed what I suspect many men now feel."You don't want to be that creep in the bar," he explained, "Tinder lessens that risk of instant rejection, that's why it is successful. But since when did women want a man delivered in a safety net?This discussion led me to do some deep-thinking on this very pertinent, and in today’s context, very important issue.The online world is exciting no doubt, and one can make many more friends here than in the real world, but there is also the associated risk of stranger-danger.If we see someone we like across a bar, we're more likely to unlock our phone and start swiping to see if they crop up on Bumble or Happn than we are to go over and talk to them.Admittedly the bar pick up has long had a bad rep as a y move, where women hang around in slinky cocktail dresses waiting to either be claimed by a man or throw a martini in their face.It makes me want to talk listen to what they say." My female friends all agreed the confidence it takes to walk up to them cold - when done properly - makes all men instantly more attractive.In other words, you likely to be two steps ahead of your Tinder profile already. They give many people who feel insecure the opportunity and confidence to explore the idea of meeting someone in a relatively safe way.