This description is psychologically correct because selfishness, while falsely appearing to have many benefits, actually turns the person in upon himself/herself, thereby interfering with healthy self-giving which is essence of marital love.
Subsequently, this personality weakness creates significant pain and suffering in marriages and families.
In betrothed love the spouse surrenders himself/herself to the other so that the spouse no longer thinks primarily "me" but "we." This oneness and flow of love between a husband and wife in some ways is to model after the love and the openness within the heart of God, the Trinity.
John Paul II wrote, “God is revealed in the communion between man and woman, for this communion images the love that God himself is.” ,7.
Also, there were significant associations with bipolar I disorder (mania), post-traumatic stress disorder and borderline personality disorder.
In our clinical experience episodes of excessive anger, including intermittent explosive disorder, are also associated with selfishness.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church has an excellent section on marriage which can be enormously helpful in understanding marriage and in protecting spouses and children from the harmful effects of selfishness.
Unfortunately, many spouses and children develop a sense of superiority and pride from their selfishness which blocks their willingness to address this serious personality weakness.
Spouses, parents, educators and clergy would benefit from this expose of the severe damage being caused by narcissism to western culture. Jean Twenge's 2007 study of almost 17,000 college students revealed that two thirds of them scored high on a measure of narcissism which was an increase of 30% over the past twenty years. Twenge commented that narcissistic people are more likely to have romantic relationships that are short lived, are at greater risk for infidelity, lack consistent emotional warmth, exhibit game-playing and dishonesty and manifest overly controlling and violent behaviors.
These behaviors in young adults are often fostered by a highly prevalent permissive parenting style.
This video segment describes the failure of spouses to work on developing healthy personalities and the resultant harmful rise in selfishness with its toxic effects upon marriage, (2009) by psychologists Jean Twenge and W.
Keith Campbell, should be required reading in marital enrichment programs, in precana programs and in high schools. in the department of psychiatry, at University of California, Irvine, has written an outstanding review of and of this conflict, .