There’s always the allure of finding something better or just different.
When you know someone in common, there’s a bit of reputation on the line so you behave differently.
Perhaps a better strategy would hinge upon Mark Granovetter’s research.
That adds up to around 12 hours a week, all in hopes of scoring a date that lasts approx. Modern dating’s not only exhausting – It’s a part-time job!But my goal wasn’t to fuck around, I was here to find that special someone. We took turns, and she rowed with the vigor of a thousand vikings.The excess of choice made me wary of missing out on my perfect match. To make sure I wouldn’t miss out, I designed a rigorous first-date process. I went on 150 first dates but didn’t manage to find the One. At some point, we got lost and I used this opportunity to steal a magical first kiss. I wanted to tell her that I liked her, but I was anxious that she wouldn’t. I decided to hack the system and go for volume instead of personalization. I was determined to find the One, even if it meant swiping right the whole Bay Area.I needed to come up with a rigorous and scientific process. You need a certain amount of candidates to be able to benchmark what quality means, and humans are really difficult to assess. I had to qualify each lead — see with which girl there was a fit and with which there wasn’t, to maximize chances of finding the One. Openers, follow-up messages, swiping, bookmarking, text messages and phone number recording. I assumed canned messages wouldn’t work well, but after over 10,000 sent, there wasn’t a significant response rate difference between personalized and generic messages. I became an online dating magician who knew how to optimize a profile — A/B testing pictures and message. I want to find the One, the special relationship that will last many years and multiply happiness. But I’m bad at small talk, and I jump too fast to intellectual conversations, making it awkward. I wanted to find the perfect match, so I wasn’t going to be an amateur about it. I’m a fat, bald, short guy whose only quality is that he isn’t an ax murderer. Since I’m 31, and eventually want a family, I figured I’d better not procrastinate. For any serious endeavor, you need a serious process.In computer science, this is known as the optimal stopping algorithm, aka the secretary problem. An abstraction layer capable of managing online dating for me: My first problem was solved: getting leads into the pipeline. If I changed my profile picture and got more “likes” as a result, that meant it was better.I was tracking data, which made it easy to see what performed best.Guys face 3 major hurdles when it comes to meeting women online: Problem #1: Most dating sites and apps have more men than women, which means the most attractive women get bombarded with messages. Problem #2: Matching algorithms don’t work because they typically rely on information that’s easily quantified online, such as behavioral traits and simple beliefs.But how do you quantify chemistry on a dating site?